But there's the other side of me that just needs to vent! Like seriously just let it all out.
I am so tired.
I finally have a free moment to myself today and I literally don't even know what to do with myself. Do I shower?
Do I catch up on This is Us?
Do I get something to eat? My dinner consisted of Jag's leftovers.....
Do I go to sleep?
Or do I just enjoy the silence and no one touching or needing anything from me?
Being a mom is so tough. I love it. But there are days I just want to cuss it out and punch it in the face and call it a day.
Now, this might be some of my PPD coming out, (which why is that even a thing? I was just pregnant for 9 months and delivered a baby.....why do I have to feel like this and literally have no control over it?) but there are days I just want to go back to bed and try again tomorrow.
Today Rafe asked me why I'm in my pajamas all day...... well Rafe, Mom hasn't had 5 minutes to myself without a crying baby attached to her hip to be able to change into something different. Forget brushing my teeth or putting on any makeup or doing something with the hideous bun that's been on my head for the last 3 days! What I really told him is that sometimes, when your a mom, you get to wear stretchy pants. It is for fun. It's fantastic! I love it!
I love my life I love my life I love my life.
I'm going to bed now to try and sleep off this negativity!
annnnddddd I just remembered I have laundry in the washing machine....sshhhheeeeiiiiittttt.
I'm going to sleep.
p.s. Shout out to all you mommas who feel me on this! It's ok to have a bad day/week and totally be mad at life for a minute, right?!